.the five senses.

and may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love is. may you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God.
ephesians 3:18-19 (nlt)

this past week i have experienced God's love with (almost) all five senses He has blessed me with. i am so excited to tell you about how i tasted delicious indian and italian food, how i listened to the beautiful new york philharmonic play in prospect park, how i've never felt so close to God than i did at the prayer meeting on tuesday night , how i saw an amazing shakespeare play performed in the delacorte theater in central park, and how i smelled the...well, maybe we won't talk about smells :)

.monday, july 12, 2010.

i was able to make a new friend in such a unique way, it was definitely from God! my good friend, joe vercellino's dad, dave, sent me a message telling me about a girl from their church that had just moved to new york city for an internship. i decided to see if she would want to meet for coffee sometime...and she did! so monday, we met up in soho and had a lovely time. it was so cool to be able to impart some new-comer wisdom on someone just moving to the city (like i'm a pro now...lol). since meeting up, carol has been coming to the brooklyn tabernacle and really loved the service. God is so great at setting people up in the body of Christ that need a good friend. :)

.the strand.
one of my favorite stores in new york city is the famous, strand book store. the strand is located in union square on 12th street and broadway. what makes it unique is that packed inside what looks like a small bookstore, is 18 miles of books! think...over half of what we have at our park library at central michigan! needless to say, this bookstore is pretty sweet. so the entire time i've been in new york, i've been looking for a small bible. i have been wanting to replace the small one i gave away a few months ago on a trip in detroit. so in my mind, i've had a picture of the perfect little bible. it would be pink and brown on the front...plain. small and light, and the nlt translation. just right. every book store i would go in, i would look in the bible section and would see plenty of small bibles, but something was always "off" when i held it. it wasn't right. and i knew when i found "my bible", i would just know. well, carol and i are at the strand...not a Christian book store by any means, and i stumble across two small shelves with bibles on them. and there it was. my bible. it was pink and brown, small and light. when i held it, it was almost calling out to me (hehe) telling me it was the one. it was so cool!! i was so excited that after months, i had found just what i was looking for...and it was on this dusty old shelf at the strand...just waiting for me too. :)

.tuesday, july 13, 2010.

.prayer meeting!!!

so despite how wonderful things have been since coming to new york, for some reason the past couple of days had been somewhat difficult and for whatever reason, i was ready to throw in the towel on tuesday. i was so unbelievably ready to come home, be back at his house, see my friends, and get the heck out of new york. until God met me at the prayer meeting. here's the story...

sunday, at the 9 am worship service, pastor cymbala interrupted the worship leader and informed the church that we needed to pray. he knows a pastor that started a church in pakistan and had been informed by him that a group of 10,000 angry muslim's were out yelling in the city, "kill all the Christians...death to the Christians!". when he called pastor (9 am our time, 4 am in his country), his family was hiding from this angry mob up on their rooftop, with the mob threatening to burn their house down and kill them. pastor informed us of this and the entire church body began crying out to God in prayer for the pastor and his family. it was such a powerful time of prayer. we all believed that God can use us praying in brooklyn to reach our brothers and sisters in pakistan. with that, we resumed worship and were told we would receive an update at the prayer meeting on tuesday.

so i am sitting right up front at the prayer meeting and pastor cymbala comes up to give us the update. just as we were praying on sunday, a strong wind moved in on the city and brought rain and scattered the entire mob in the city!! and not only did God save this pastor and his church that day, but because our God is a God who will do immeasurably more than we can ask or imagine (ephesians 3:20!), the government got the leaders of the muslim mob and the pastors of the church together and they agreed to sign a peace treaty to end all violence between any religious groups! PRAISE GOD!! as pastor is telling us this, everyone in the church exploded into praise. my eyes flooded with tears of thanksgiving and faith and in that moment, i have never felt so close to God in my entire life. His presence was so thick and heavy, it truly overwhelmed me in the most beautiful way possible. for what could have gone on forever (and thankfully will someday!) we praised God anyway we possibly could. it was really one of the most influential moments of my life.

and this is just the beginning of the prayer meeting!! so here i am praising God and weeping at this prayer meeting and pastor cymbala begins to give the message for the night. he directs us to 1 kings 15:9-22 and 2 chronicles 16:1-10 where it talks about king asa's rule. he tells us about the first 36 out of 41 years of king asa's rule was different. he was a good king that turned around a lot of the terrible things that had been happening before he began his rule. there was victory and wonderful things were happening. but then the king stopped trusting God and things started to go south. by the end of his reign, things were worse off than when he began! all going to say that we must finish well. it just hit me! i was going into cruise mode, just wanting to cruise through the next few weeks wishing i was back at home. when God says, "no! you need to keep trusting Me until the end. it's not over yet, so don't treat it like it is just because you miss your friends or things are getting tough. I still have things to teach you and haven't I helped you all along? why would I leave you now?" isn't it so true that we need to be renewed by God each day. i felt as though pastor cymbala was speaking right to my heart that night. i needed to finish my time in new york strong. that wanting to throw in the towel early was not an option for me. that God was not finished with me yet.

.wednesday, july 14, 2010.

katie's birthday! i woke up with a renewed sense of being in new york. i sipped my morning coffee from my special coffee mug that reminds me that God is new every morning. that He is refreshing and unchanging.

one thing that i really enjoy about new york is that despite the fact that it is bursting with the latest trends and new ipads and whatever else, it is still such an old world and nostalgic city. on my way to the subway, i stopped by the pastry shop to buy katie a piece of birthday cake. you can get old fashioned gelato and people still go to the bakery and pastry shops to buy their bread. people mosey about town with their carts of groceries and fresh bread and old ladies sit on their stoops and porch steps watching the sun go down and chattering about the days comings and goings. everyone uses little window air conditioners to cool down their apartments from the sweltering heat (which if you haven't heard, there has only been 5 days in july below 90 degrees!...it has been a hooooooooot summer!). all to say, it is really cool to be a part of this nostalgic yet booming city of new york :)

katie and i celebrated her birthday and truly had a lovely time enjoying each others company. it is really a blessing from the Lord that we are both in new york at the same time. He is so good.

.thursday, july 15, 2010.

a day to catch up on laundry and life. :) sometimes it is just so nice to catch my breath, read, journal, and simply praise God for what He is doing here. these are the days that i can still hardly believe i am living in new york. really living. doing laundry, getting groceries at the market, saying hello to maria, the sweet italian lady next door...life things! i am sure most of the big things won't sink in until we are in the car on the way home and it's all going to hit me...i actually did it. God did it. we did it together. :)

.friday, july 16, 2010.

.new york philharmonic.
probably since middle school i have known about the new york philharmonic. they are among the top orchestras in the world. when i was in high school and preparing to be studying music in college, i had the opportunity to meet the principle flute player of the new york philharmonic. i attended a workshop she was teaching and learned that at the young age of 16, jeanne backstresser attended the julliard school. she had been playing as the principle flute for 25 years. needless to say, many of these musicians are the very best or one of the best players on their instrument in the world. it is a new york tradition that the philharmonic plays free concerts in the parks in all five boroughs for one week in the summer.

this was something i had been looking forward way before i made the move to new york and the day was finally here! my friend anna and i met in prospect park in brooklyn hours before the concert would begin to set our blankets down in the very front section. we had a lovely afternoon of socializing and welcoming our friends as they all trickled in one by one to our prime spot. they came with food, bubbly, games, and smiles. as we all ate and enjoyed each otters company, the concert came in no time. the philharmonic blessed us with tchaikovsky's polonaise from eugene onegin, bernstin's symphonic dances from west side story (!!!), and prokofiev's selections from romeo and juliet. the sounds that erupted from that stage was some of the most beautiful music my ears has ever heard. it was almost like a dream. the perfect evening ended with a firework display over the stage. it was the perfect orchestra with the perfect friends and a perfect night.

.saturday, july 17, 2010.

.shakespeare in the park.

just like the traditional new york philharmonic concerts in the park, shakespeare plays at the delacorte theater in central park are one of new york's summer iconic events. some of the most passionate and diverse group of playgoers sit in line in the morning to obtain (free!) tickets to the evenings performance. i was so blessed to be invited to come along by my new friend carol (from monday!). similar to the night before, this was one of the coolest things i have done in new york. looking out over the heart of the greatest city on earth, with belvadere's castle right behind the stage, we participated in one of the best theater performances i have witnessed. and praise God for the gentle breeze He brought in to cool us off from the heat! with the live music, lights, costumes, song, and passion, it was truly an amazing experience to be a part of the public theater's production of the winter's tale and made for a beautiful saturday night!

.sunday, july 18, 2010.

if i have ever experienced contrasting churches in the same day, this was the day. we had an amazing service at the brooklyn tab where the choir sang just as beautiful as ever, God moved through each person involved, and pastor cymbala brought the Word just as boldly as ever. we are working through the book of philippians and this week was on philippians 2:15-16. the message was clear, simple, and convicting. don't complain. do everything without complaining, murmuring, or grousing...because Jesus never murmured. boy, did i have to look back to the day before where i murmured the whole time i was on the subway going slow, and repent!! katie and i decided this means we can no longer slander the mta (subway) via text messaging or at all period :)

after hearing and being to moved to tears by an amazing gospel artist, alvin slaughter, at the later service at the tab, i traveled from downtown brooklyn to the upper east side of manhattan to attend redeemer prespaterian church. there was such a contrast from my earlier experience. though different in style, both are good and are reaching people for Christ. redeemer was much more conservative, and people kept to themselves. there was a few people on stage playing light jazz music for the offering and played a few hymns to enter in to worship. the room was packed, but for me, it was hard to feel like a family like we do at the tab. i had heard of redeemer from attending the leadership summit last year where their senior pastor, tim keller, captivated my attention with his intellectual interpretation of the story of the prodigal son (luke 15:11-32). it is really unique to experience such different styles of how people are connecting to God...in the same day...in the same city.

my day ended with some deeeeelicious indian food in astoria, my neighborhood! the one thing i have really loved about being in new york is all the different ethnic places to eat...surprise, surprise! :) getting any kind of food, any variety, ethnicity, will be something i will truly miss when i move back to michigan.

this week was filled with some of the most wonderful and memorable sights, tastes, sounds, and feelings of my entire time in new york city. and although they are not directly associated with God firsthand, i have found God in each of these things. He is the creator of all and His love can be found in things, if only we recognize it! i praise Him for all He has done and is doing and is still going to do!

.holy holy holy is the Lord God Almighty.

what comes into our minds when we think about God is the most important thing about us...worship is pure or base as the worshiper entertains high or low thoughts about God. for this reason the gravest question before the church is always God Himself, and the most portentous fact about any man is not what he at a given time may say or do, but what he in his deep heart conceives God to be like.

-a.w. tozer; quoted from 'crazy love' by francis chan

.i am learning a lot about God. and when i say a lot, it is a crummy two words to describe the multitude God is teaching me about Himself. growing up, i guess i never had any idea how much God loves me. and along with that, my deep heart did not always conceive God to be that of love. but that is changing now more that it ever has before.

with that, i have chosen to forgo my normal formatting of day by day activities and lessons learned, but to let God lead me in attempting to convey what He is teaching me. so, this is what has come into my mind when i think about God as the most important thing about me and my time in new york city...

.a new revelation of my salvation. learned on tuesday, june 29, 2010.

.we were given beauty for ashes.
i was getting ready for the day, and i was listening to a song by cory asbury. this line of the song (we were given beauty for ashes) stuck out to me, and i began to ponder the meaning. the thing is, before Jesus, ashes was our destiny. scripture says, for the wages of sin is death (romans 6:23). however, when you continue to read, the verse finishes by saying, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord. therefore, death has no sting, and what was once ashes, is now our gift to freely enjoy. we were given beauty for ashes. with this in my mind, i went about my day and headed to the brooklyn tabernacle.

i spent my day volunteering to help pack suitcases for the missions team leaving to serve in the philippines. but it wasn't until the prayer meeting that night that God brought the truth i experience earlier full circle. within the first few minutes of worship, onajae, the worship leader started speaking about this scripture he read earlier that day. it was from isaiah chapter 61...

the spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me, because the Lord has anointed me to preach good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners, to proclaim the year of the Lord's favor and the day of vengeance of our God, to comfort all who mourn, and provide for those who grieve in zion - to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. they will be called oaks of righteousness a planting of the Lord for the display of his splendor.

i can't tell you how many times my eyes have seen these verses, and i have never picked up on that particular phrase in the verse. but you better believe tears filled my eyes, as onajae read and my ears were in tune to the Spirit. it was like God was confirming that i heard right that morning. and also, how cool is it that we are called oaks of righteousness! :)

as amazing as it was to learn this, the days to follow were increasingly difficult for me. as i think back now, after the last four days learning lessons that changed (or are changing, rather) my life, it is hard for me to even say things were difficult. however, i will attempt to explain what i think God is doing with me. :)

on .wednesday, june 30, 2010. i was hitting a low point in my nyc adventure.

i can't really explain why, or how, or even what was going on with me. i just wanted to come home to michigan and that was that. my friend, erica wylie was flying in to visit the next day and i couldn't be more excited to have someone from his house to spend some quality time with. the best explanation i can think of is the hard truth that i really was not understanding the love of God. i was dwelling on a combination or being homesick and becoming lackadaisical. since i have so much free time, i was really soaking up the sleeping in thing and taking as long as i wanted to get ready. i was not truly living out my purpose for being in new york. this is not easy to admit. but seriously, when do we ever have it all together? if this is about real life, then i must be honest.

that night, i headed to the park in astoria (where i live) and lingered around the fair that was taking place. as i watched the sun go down on the skyline and listened to the smooth rhythms of the swing jazz band, i wished just for that night i had a friend to share it with. i believe that was why i just so darn excited to have erica come visit. so i had a friend to share all the cool things of new york with all day, every day. what i didn't realize was that i have the most wonderful best friend and love to share everything with and the best part is He is always with me. if only i really realized the true love of my living, and all powerful God, i would never be lonely, but content soaking up these moments in His presence.

from .thursday, july 1 to wednesday, july 7, 2010. erica wylie came to visit.

while erica was visiting we were busy traveling around the city since erica was experiencing new york for the first time. we were able to cross many things off my bucket list too!...

#11. drink frozen hot chocolate at the serendipity cafe.

yes, just like they did in the movie. and yes, it was worth the wait. and yeah, these frozen concoctions were delicious and verrrrry chocolate-y!

#12. alter my physical appearance in some way.

technically this took place after erica left. but, long story short, i found out about salon's needing people to come in as models and get sweet deals on haircuts! so, this would work as altering my appearance and also was so cool to overlook 5th avenue, sipping on a glass of wine and this ritzy salon, getting pampered. (!!)

#25. drink bubble tea.

since we were already in bay ridge (a very concentrated asian area of brooklyn...also where katie is living for the summer!) we had dinner at a scrumptious vietnamese restaurant and purchased some bubble tea for our subway trek. interesting texture these "bubbles" were...think jelly-like, large tapioca balls, but the tea part was delicious! chalk this one up to a good experience and to say we did it. ;)

#26. hail a cab.

there was no way i could come back to mount pleasant after living in new york for two months without saying i hailed a cab. let me set the stage. 95 degrees, stuck down on 14th street and 11 ave, no subways near what-so-ever...and we need to get to 34th street. .fourth of july madness about to ensue. while we thought we could see the fireworks from 14th, we were wrong and thus needed to go about 20 blocks to the north to get a good spot. the only solution was to hail a cab. so with all the courage i could muster, i walked out to west st (along the hudson river!), put myself out there, stuck out my hand, and within a minute or so, i had hailed us a cab. not bad for my first try, i must say!

having erica here to visit was wonderful and a blessing, but as the week moved on, my hunger to be alone with the Lord only grew deeper. i knew that He was calling me to teach me something that was going to provide a turning point in my life.

i can't even remember the series of events that led me to where i am now, but all i know is this. earlier in my time here, i surrendered everything to God. now this seems pretty basic, but what i mean by this is letting the Holy Spirit have access to every facet of my being. i think so many times we say we are "sold out" to God, when really we are hanging on to some things that we just don't want to give up (or maybe this is just me, i don't know). so through this surrender, as a love offering to God, my desire is to be obedient to everything i sense the Holy Spirit leading me to do. even things as small (or as big depending on how you view it) as what chapter to read in my Bible, to dropping everything to pray, to encouraging people with words. let me tell you, when you start becoming submissive to God's leading, you realize how insignificant you are and just how big He is.

i've been reading a lot since i moved to new york. the subway rides can get kind of long and with no cell phone service underground, there is not much else to do. let's just say this has been a great thing. i just finished a book by carol cymbala (pastor cymbala's wife and director of the grammy award winning choir) called, He's been faithful. through a combination of reading and finishing this book alongside the Word, meeting with the director of women's ministry on thursday, and attending the brooklyn tabernacle women's conference on friday night, God revealed Himself to me. but i gained this knowledge: God is so much bigger than we will ever know on this earth. we only have a mere 66 books of the Bible for God to reveal Himself to us! francis chan says in his book, crazy love (which i began friday), "but many facets of God expand beyond our comprehension." we will only understand the fullness of God and all that He is when we get to heaven.

so i am immersed in all these things all at once, learning about how big this God is that we serve, and how He is holy, eternal, all-knowing, all-powerful, and fair and just. and i realize that i am seriously falling in love with God all over again. and there is nothing greater than knowing Jesus.

i am reading the words of francis chan and he writes in crazy love, that both in revelation 4 and isaiah 6, we have a picture or a glimpse of the heavenly throne room. and it is so powerful to read these chapters in scripture and try to imagine what the throne room of God looks like, and then to be reminded what our response to God should be.

and i'm sitting at this women's conference listening to maria durso speak. she's telling us all about sheep and lanolin (the ointment they produce through their wool). i'm thinking, how in the world is this even relevant? but after she shared her amazing testimony of finding God after a life of abuse and drugs that brought me to tears, i trusted she was going to bring it full circle. and she did. think about all the times God refers to Himself as the shepherd and us as the sheep. (this intrigued me so much i went in my Bible when i got home and highlighted every example of this in scripture). and now, go and research all you can about sheep and think about it as it relates to us and God. prepare to be blown away. then after you've read all you can about sheep, and shepherds, and lanolin (!!), read 1 john 2:27. .wow.

so, i don't know if this made any sense. i know i think and talk in circles, but that's how God made me, and so that's what you get. all i know, is God is doing something big...like He never has before in me. and i guess it's hard for me to articulate all that it is into words, but trust that the Holy Spirit is at work and that's cool because that's actually GOD working in us (philippians 2:12-13!). which is cool because as i'm learning all this...pastor cymbabla preached on those exact verses at the brooklyn tabernacle yesterday morning. .love.

day and night they never stop saying: holy holy holy is the Lord God Almighty, who was, and is, and is to come.

revelation 4:8